Stories help children and young people
to understand and express their grief.
Find a Book for a Grieving Child or Young Person
Below you will find a selection of books that have been recommended by our ICBN Project Advisory Group, our Network Members who work with bereaved children, and our colleagues in the Irish Hospice Foundation. You can search by author, title, age, theme, and/or accessibility.
Provides answers to difficult questions children may have about death and dying.
A practical format for allowing children to understand the concept of death...
Grade level: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, k, e, p,...
The death of a parent, sibling or friend is one of the...
Libraries and Local Organisations - Get Involved
Are you working with bereaved children and families in a healthcare, education, community, library, or bereavement setting? Creating a shelf of children and young people’s books that you can either use with children or lend to familes could be a great addition to your work.
Use our Recommended Reading List to get started. You could add a poster to your wall where families can scan for more information. Or you could order some of our Children Grieve Too bookmarks.
Children's Books Ireland - Loss & Grief Reading List
This year, we were delighted to collaborate with Children’s Books Ireland as part of Bereaved Children’s Awareness Week.
Publications Manager Ruth Concannon has curated a thoughtful collection of books for their Loss and Grief Reading List. With a focus on titles from the past five years in English and ten years in Irish, these are fresh contemporary voices in the bereavement space.
Children’s Books Ireland regularly curate themed lists with recommendations for children of all ages. Keep an eye on their website.
Vision Ireland's BookBridge Project in partnership with the ICBN
For the last number of years we have proudly partnered with Vision Ireland and their fantastic Book Bridge Project to create some accessible resources to support families experiencing bereavement and loss. Vision Ireland’s Book Bridge Project is centered around the conversion of trusted children’s books and resources into braille and audio formats. A huge thank you to Peter and Lina for their work on and dedication to this project.
As adults we often are unsure of the words to use and how to have these difficult and emotional conversations. Vision Ireland and ICBN recognised the need to ensure that supportive and empowering information is accessible for all families, and we are delighted to expand our resource options within our website.
You can find out more about each of the resources below.
Anyone who wishes to access the Braille and audio versions of the resources can do so by emailing [email protected].
You Will Be Ok
About the Resource
The death of a parent, sibling or friend is one of the most traumatic experiences for a child or young person and it can be hard to know how to talk to them about it. In this honest, comforting and strength-building guide Julie Stokes, a clinical psychologist and founder of childhood bereavement charity Winston’s Wish, provides readers with the tools they need to navigate this tough and turbulent time.
Readers will discover the stories of other people who have been through grief themselves. They will learn how to flex their ‘grief muscles’ in order to develop confidence, trust, grit, a resilient mindset and flexible feelings - the ability to notice, accept and talk about emotions when they choose to. And packed with practical exercises, such as creating memory boxes and managing different kinds of memories using ‘memory stones’, this guide will give readers helpful ways to manage their grief so they can begin to move forward with life.
Because there is no right or wrong way to grieve, you just need to find your own way.
Accessible Versions
- Email [email protected] for access to the Braille and audio versions of the book.
Safe Harbour Storybook
and Guide
About the Resource
Safe Harbour is an illustrated storybook for children who have been bereaved by suicide.
It has been developed by bereavement experts- including professionals and people with lived experience – to help a child with their grief by encouraging conversation and developing their understanding of death and suicide.
Safe Harbour is a story told by a young child whose parent has died by suicide. It contains words and illustrations that a child can relate to, and that describe what that journey was like for them.
This work has been funded by the HSE National Office for Suicide Prevention (NOSP) as part of Connecting for Life, Ireland’s National Strategy to Reduce Suicide.
Safe Harbour was written by Patricia Forde and illustrated by Bronagh Lee.
Accessible Versions
- Click here to access the Audiobooks in English and in Irish.
- Email [email protected] for access to the Braille and audio versions of both the story book and the accompanying Safe Harbour – Helpful Guide for Parents and Carers.
Peter and the Wolf
About the Resource
In 2003, Bono and Gavin Friday originally created Peter & the Wolf, a book based on Sergei Prokofiev’s 1936 symphony, in support of the Irish Hospice Foundation. Twenty years later, the story of Peter was transformed into a short animated film, along with a new book, music, and merchandise to further support the Irish Hospice Foundation.
Peter & the Wolf follows a grieving 12-year-old Peter, who is now in the care of his grandfather, who himself is adjusting to life after the death of his daughter. When we meet Peter, he’s an angsty adolescent, but over the course of the story, a sensitive side emerges along with his resourcefulness and determination to uncover a thoughtful and very human side of himself. Each character in this telling of Peter & the Wolf represents different aspects of Peter, with the wolf embodying his relationship with grief and the unknown, his grandfather representing his connection to family and the forest creatures who capture the comedy, naivete and carefree elements of childhood.
Accessible Versions
- Email [email protected] for access to the Braille and audio versions of the book.
The Invisible Leash
About the Resource
Using the same simple but effective bonding concept from The Invisible String, which has been used for healing countless readers living with grief, The Invisible Leash illustrates the spiritual connection pet owners have with their animals.
After Zach’s dog, Jojo, dies, his friend Emily tries to comfort him with the “best news ever”: an invisible leash around our hearts connects everyone to their pets no matter where they are, on this Earth or somewhere beyond –maybe they are even near right now. Zach is skeptical, saying he only believes in what he can see, but Emily lets him find his own way to eventually come to feel the comforting tug of the Invisible Leash.
Accompanied by emotive and uplifting art by Joanne Lew-Vriethoff, Patrice Karst’s gentle story celebrates the love, warmth, and joy that animals give us in this life and beyond.
Accessible Versions
- Email [email protected] for access to the Braille and audio versions of the book.
The Invisible String
About the Resource
The Invisible String by Patrice Karst is a children’s book that explores the unbreakable bonds of love and connection. Through a simple yet powerful metaphor, it tells the story of twins who learn from their mother that an invisible string connects them to their loved ones, no matter where they are. The book provides comfort to children dealing with separation, loss, or anxiety, emphasizing that love transcends distance.
Accessible Versions
- Email [email protected] for access to the Braille and audio versions of the book.
Badger's Parting Gifts
About the Resource
Badger’s Parting Gifts by Susan Varley is a children’s book about loss, grief, and remembrance. When Badger passes away, his friends feel deep sadness but gradually find comfort in recalling the valuable lessons and happy memories he left behind. Through gentle storytelling and beautiful illustrations, the book helps children understand and cope with the emotions of losing a loved one.
Accessible Versions
- Email [email protected] for access to the Braille and audio versions of the book.
- You can listen to the audio book below, chapter by chapter.
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Always in My Heart
A book for 9-12 year old’s who are experiencing grief
About the Resource
“Always in My Heart” is a book for 9-12 year olds who are experiencing grief.
The book was written by the social work team of St Francis Hospice Dublin in collaboration with bereaved families.
The stories in it are real-life examples, with names and details changed. This book is designed to be used by parents and guardians to support and guide a child as they grieve. All names and situations have been adapted, so the stories included are not one child’s story, but rather an amalgamation of the worries and experiences that many children have described.
Thanks to sponsorship by Amazon Web Services, this book is available free of charge to anyone who might find it helpful. Shipping is free of charge to addresses in Ireland. Orders outside of Ireland will receive a downloadable version of the book by email.
Accessible Versions
- Email [email protected] for access to the Braille and audio versions of the book.
- You can listen to the audio below, chapter by chapter.
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Finding Your Way through Grief: For teenagers and young adults
About the Resource
“Finding your way through grief: For teenagers and young adults” is the first book in the Irish context designed as a resource for young people themselves to use as they navigate their way through bereavement and loss.
This book was written by the social work team of St Francis Hospice Dublin in collaboration with bereaved teenagers.
These young people speak in the book about what helped them in their grief, and we hope this will help others understand how grief can affect us and what can help.
Thanks to sponsorship by Amazon Web Services, this book is available free of charge to anyone who might find it helpful.
Accessible Versions
- Email [email protected] for access to the Braille and audio versions of the book.
- You can listen to the audio book below, chapter by chapter.
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The Heart and the Bottle
About the Resource
In this deeply moving story, Oliver Jeffers deals with the weighty themes of love and loss with a lightness of touch and shows us, ultimately, that there is always hope.
Once there was a girl whose life was filled with wonder at the world around her… Then one day something happened that made the girl take her heart and put it in a safe place. However, after that it seemed that the world was emptier than before. But would she know how to get her heart back?
Accessible Versions
- Email [email protected] for access to the Braille and audio versions of the book.
Understanding
Children's Grief
About the Resource
This leaflet is from the Irish Childhood Bereavement Network.
It helps the reader to understand the way children process grief, and gives tips on trying to support them so that they don’t feel that they should be ‘over it’ within a certain period of time – and more importantly so they don’t think something is wrong with them if they feel the loss coming up again and again.
Adults can help children understand that this is a normal process of grief. We can’t promise things will get back to normal, but we can help them learn to live
with their ‘new normal’ without the loved one.
Accessible Versions
- Email [email protected] for access to the Braille and audio versions of the leaflet.
- You can listen to the audio version below.
Page 1: Front page and Introduction
Page 1 – 3: Age Groups
Page 4: Families
Page 4: Schools
Page 4 – 5: How Can I hep? and ICBN Details
Professionals Using Books to Support Children
A huge variety of books address the theme of loss. Because of the interplay of verbal and visual stimuli, books can offer a powerful opening to discussion on challenging topics.
When a child is bereaved, adults – including teachers – sometimes look for a book to help them explain what is going on. However, the classroom setting may not be the right time either for the bereaved child or his/her classmates. It can be confronting. It can increase self consciousness for the child.
Where some one to one time is available with a teacher, home school liaison worker, guidance counsellor, or other school staff, there can be some good opportunties to use books. We have compiled some tips for school staff, including some recommendations, in the document below.
Fullscreen Mode
Using the Curriculum
Consider where loss is already part of the curriculum, and avoid shying away from it as part of the overall learning of the child. In SPHE (Social, Personal and Health Education) for example, when exploring feelings, picture books are used to initiate a discussion about the effects of loss on a character. Younger children might read Gentle Willow [Mills 2004], and talk about the sadness of the animals when the willow tree dies and how they plan to remember her. Senior classes might discuss Her Mother’s Face [Doyle 2008], and talk about the struggles families experience as they grieve in different ways. In this way children explore the topic in a distance way and develop empathy and sensitivity, while no child is under pressure to share personal stories if they do not wish to.
In SESE (Social, Environmental and Scientific Education) children study life cycles, so death is part of the conversation. A book such as The Lonely Tree [Halliday 2006] offers young children a chance to look at the life and death of an oak tree and allows them to integrate both cognitively and emotionally.
History is another subject where death can be part of the discussion. Take the opportunity to explore the impact of historical events on individual lives and communities. The book Sadako [Coerr 1997] tells the story of a child in Hiroshima who develops cancer in the aftermath of the atom bomb. It is a story of loss but also of friendship, community, and ultimately hope. The book can offer an integration of English, History, SPHE and Visual Art.
Exploring loss in the classroom is best done when nobody is recently bereaved but in recognition that death is part of life. Giving children have a language for loss and an understanding of its effects means they can manage relationships with their peers with more sensitivity when a death occurs.
The book and resource lists on this site are offered with a word of advice: we suggest you become familiar with the materials. Think carefully and critically about when you might use them with a class, an individual child, or a parent.
These books can help to develop a context and understanding of how death affects children.
Healing children’s Grief; surviving a parent’s death from cancer Christ, G. H (2000)
Living with Grief; Children, Adolescents, and Loss Doka, K (2000)
Children Grieving, Grieving Children, Doka, K (1995)
Helping Children Cope with Death, Dougy Center (1997)
Grief in Children A handbook for Adults Dyregrove, A (2000)
Bereaved Children and Teens: A Support Guide for Parents and Professionals Grollman, E (1995)
Working with Bereaved Children and Young People Mallon, B (2011)
Never too young to know Death in Children’s lives Silverman, P (2000)
Then, now and Always Stokes, J (2004)
Living after a death Walsh, M.P (1995)
Helping your child through bereavement Walsh, M.P (2000)
Children and Grief When a Parent Dies Worden, J.W (1996)
Workbooks
Muddles, Puddles and Sunshine- Winston’s Wish
“This is a very child-friendly workbook which covers most areas of the bereavement experience and an opportunity to explore any misconceptions the child may have about the cause of death. It has engaging exercises which children will find easy to interact with. Some of the exercises are just for fun and although they take time, they are very useful for relationship building, particularly with a shy or reluctant child.”
Waving Goodbye: An activities manual for children in grief – The Dougy Center
Features more than 45 activities to use with children and teens in peer support groups, or, for parents to use with their own children. These activities are categorized by topic and are designed to help children process their unique grief.
When some very special dies: Children can learn to cope with grief – Heegard, M (1991).
A practical format for allowing children to understand the concept of death and develop coping skills for life.
Working with Teenagers
Supporting Traumatized Children and Teenagers: A Guide to Providing Understanding and Help Dyregrov, A. (2010)
Counselling Adolecents: The proactive approach for young people, Geldard, K. and Geldard G. (2009)
Helping Teens Cope with Death, The Dougy Centre (1999)
Fire in my Heart, Ice in my veins: A journal for teenagers experiencing a loss, Samuelel Traisman.
Teens can write letters, copy down meaningful lyrics, write songs and poems, tell the person who died what they want them to know, finish business and use their creativity to work through the grieving process.
Healing a Teens Grieving Heart: 100 Practical Ideas for Families, Friends and Care Givers, Wolfelt, A. (2001)
Out of the Blue: Making Memories Last when Someone has Died, Julie Stokes and Paul Oxley (2006)
When parents die: learning to live with the loss of a parent, Rebecca Abrahams Taylor and Francis (1999)
This book covers the course of grieving from the death of a parent through to the point where the teen learns to accommodate the loss. It pays attention to the many circumstances that can prolong or complicate the grieving
Dying to know, Andrew Amastasios, Hardie Grant Books. (2010)
This book was written after many conversations with professionals who deal with grief and loss. It doesn’t claim to have all the answers. Just ideas, advice, and inspiring illustrations about a subject none can escape.
The Grieving Teen: A Guide for Teenagers and their friends, Helen Fitzgerald, Fireside. (2000)
Advice for teenagers on coping with the death of a parent, friend or loved one. It discusses the emotional impact of bereavement, signs and symptoms of getting into trouble, and special needs and concerns during the grieving process.
When a Friend dies: a book for teens about grieving and healing, Marilyn E Gootman, Free Spirit Publishing. (2005)
Speaks directly and simply to anyone who has suffered the loss of a friend.
Straight talking about death for teenagers: how to cope with losing someone you love (1993) Earl Grollman. What to expect when you lose someone you love. It discusses normal reactions to the shock of death. It looks at grief’s effects on your relationships, surviving special dates in the year, and how to work through grief and begin to live again. There is a journal section where you can record your memories of the person who has died, your feelings about the loss and your hopes for the future.
I Never Told Her I loved Her, Sandra Chick (Livewire Books for Teenagers). Fiction. (1997)
This novel explores a range of feelings, including the guilt experienced by Frankie after her mother dies.
A Gathering Light, Jennifer Donnelly, Bloomsbury Publications. Fiction. (2004)
A coming-of-age novel about a young woman. The tale of a drowned girl merges with Mattie’s own story giving her the courage to define her future.
The lost Boy’s Appreciation Society, Alan Gibbons, Orion Children’s Books. Fiction. (2004)
A 14 year old boy’s journey through the loss of his mother and negotiating his relationships with his father and brother when they are all grieving.
The Fault In Our stars (2013) John Green, Penguin. Fiction. Hazel is 16 and is living with a cancer diagnosis. Her life
A Monster Calls Patrick Ness. Fiction.
Exploring love, loss and hope, this is an excellent novel for early to mid-teens who lose a parent to illness.
Working with Traumatic Grief
Safe Harbour (HSE National Office for Suicide Prevention), 2(024) written by Patricia Forde and illustrated by Bronagh Lee. Safe Harbour is a free illustrated story book for children who have been bereaved by suicide.
Red Chocolate Elephants by Dr. Diana Sands.
Young People bereaved by suicide: What hinders and what helps by David Trickey, Childhood Bereavement UK
A Special Scar By Alison Wertheimer (1992). A discussion of suicide from an adult perspective. An invaluable resource for those helping children and families bereaved through suicide.
Silent Grief by Christopher Lukas and Henry M Seiden
Up on Cloud Nine by Ann Fine (2006).
A story about the friendship between two boys, one of whom is in hospital after a serious ‘accident’ – the implication is that this has been a suicide attempt. The subject is handled with warmth and appropriate humour.
Beyond the Rough Rock: Supporting a child who has been bereaved through suicide by Winston’s Wish.
A resource for helping parents to talk to children about suicide, especially if the child had not been told at the time of death.
Where to Source?
Most of the books mentioned throughout this page can be bought online but be sure to check out your local independent bookshop. Bookshops are usually happy to order books in for you if they don’t already have them in stock.
You can also borrow them from your local public library or an academic institute if you are a past pupil. The Irish Hospice Foundation has a death, dying, and bereavement library and many of the publications will be available to borrow through their Library. The Library is based in Dublin but they can send a book by post to those living outside the city.
Some of the books, including ones by St Francis Hospice Social Work Department, are free to order. You can find them above by searching St Francis Hospice Dublin as the author. Safe Harbour is also a free resource.
If you have a book you would like to recommend for our lists, please email us at [email protected]. We would love to hear about it. Our lists are always growing.
If you are having any trouble at all finding the right book, drop us an email at [email protected] and we will do our best to help.